Let's have some fun. Let us know if you agree or not.
Things EDH players will never say:
1) I love how you've taken 15 minutes for this turn, storming off and rolling up your planeswalkers and still have 2 extra turns. 2) You can pull the card out of the two sleeves to get a better look and bend test it. 3) All my opponents have either a Smothering Tithe, Rhystic Study or both. Glad I'm in this game. 4) We can go back a turn so you can respond, since you were not paying attention to the game. 5) It's nice that I have no mana ramp cards and also missing land drops on turn 3. 6) Sacrificing lands to annihilator is the best feeling ever! 7) I hope they don't reprint the good cards that everyone wants in any of the pre-cons. 8) Having someone take my turn to use all my good spells and destroy my board state is fun to watch. 9) They should ban Evolving Wilds and Terramorphic Expanse as it sees so much play and slows the game down. 10) 10 dice is enough for my hydra tribal deck. 11) You don't have to announce what you are playing to any of us. We're all mind readers. 12) Keep casting those curses on me. I gotta catch them all.
13) Tutoring for tutors helps me thin out my deck so I can get my combo pieces more easily. 14) I wish that people would play Armageddon and Blood Moon more. 15) Boros is the strongest color combination. 16) Sure you can eat your food on top of my play mat that you borrowed. 17) I've never missed a trigger in my life. 18) Don't make deals with me. I'll back stab you all the time every time. No exceptions. 19) Going last is the best! 20) Each spell which costs 4 extra mana is the kind of tax I can get behind.
Did we miss any? Leave a comment below telling us!